So, I've had pain in my knee. Pain that keeps me from doing the things I love, like dancing and hiking. It's been dogging me since about November. I've done PT for it - but the day after doing something I love, it's always worse for a few days.
Looking inside, my question was: am I supposed to step away from activities that I truly love? (I love how even this thought reflects a need to MOVE. I tend to be movement-oriented.)
Sometimes things are revealed in a sudden flash of insight: I was blessed by such a flash this morning. It's because my businesses haven't been thriving - and I've had this soul crushing feeling of "I can't go on." I have been on the verge of giving up. Because I love these businesses (both of them, in different ways), it was infringing on other things I love (dance, hike, physical movement).
My flash was: the knee was a physical reflection of my psychological state. And the truth is, I can indeed, and will indeed, go on. The businesses may have to change a bit, my hiking, walking and dancing may have to change a bit, but I can and WILL continue to do the things I love to do.
Got it? My knee almost immediately felt better, even. Although the PT will continue to be needed, it won't interfere if I can help it, at all.
Be well, be blissful. I hope you can all have a flash of insight today, and reveal where and how your own pain is coming from. And now, I need to go move!
Sincerely, Tomboy Vicki
TomboysEtc
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
Sunday, November 17, 2013
Curly Hair omg omg omg
I have curly hair. I don't mean "slightly wavy", I mean, OMFG, it starts to re-curl about 10 minutes after straightening. I have CURLS.
Now if you have straight hair and envy curly hair, just close this window now. What follows may be hard to read if you've spent a lot of time and money trying to GET curly.
OK - the fundamental problem for me and my hair, is acceptance. My hair is curly. It will not be straight, barring heavy chemical sedation. I have learned to live with it; I had to decide how much time and effort to put into it, which determined whether to have short or long hair. I don't like spending a lot of time on it, so I have short hair. Then I had to learn to take good care of it. I need two things for good hair care:
1. A stylist who really REALLY knows how to cut curly hair. I just found one within a mile of my house, which is awesome! On me, a good cut will start to look raggedy after a couple of weeks. A GREAT cut looks good for 4 to 6 weeks. And then go regularly - the first time you look in the mirror and see -meh-, make the appointment that very second. Don't wait! You wear your hair every day. (Note: I still love The Hair God, but my address is NE, he works in SW - and if you know traffic around here ... If you are local, and the SW address doesn't make you cringe, and you have hair, ANY kind of hair, call me - I'll tell you where he practices his magic.)
2. Truly awesome conditioner. I can't use conditioner designed for straight hair. And if I see the word "volume" anywhere on the label, I run! Actually, I like to have several conditioners, depending on the weather (windy, rainy, sunny, dry, hot, humid). The label usually includes words like "curl," "smoothing," "taming,", or "control." Sometimes, I use more than one.
You can look great and still be a tomboy! Trust me. :-)
Now if you have straight hair and envy curly hair, just close this window now. What follows may be hard to read if you've spent a lot of time and money trying to GET curly.
OK - the fundamental problem for me and my hair, is acceptance. My hair is curly. It will not be straight, barring heavy chemical sedation. I have learned to live with it; I had to decide how much time and effort to put into it, which determined whether to have short or long hair. I don't like spending a lot of time on it, so I have short hair. Then I had to learn to take good care of it. I need two things for good hair care:
1. A stylist who really REALLY knows how to cut curly hair. I just found one within a mile of my house, which is awesome! On me, a good cut will start to look raggedy after a couple of weeks. A GREAT cut looks good for 4 to 6 weeks. And then go regularly - the first time you look in the mirror and see -meh-, make the appointment that very second. Don't wait! You wear your hair every day. (Note: I still love The Hair God, but my address is NE, he works in SW - and if you know traffic around here ... If you are local, and the SW address doesn't make you cringe, and you have hair, ANY kind of hair, call me - I'll tell you where he practices his magic.)
2. Truly awesome conditioner. I can't use conditioner designed for straight hair. And if I see the word "volume" anywhere on the label, I run! Actually, I like to have several conditioners, depending on the weather (windy, rainy, sunny, dry, hot, humid). The label usually includes words like "curl," "smoothing," "taming,", or "control." Sometimes, I use more than one.
You can look great and still be a tomboy! Trust me. :-)
Saturday, September 28, 2013
The importance of proper shoes!
Geez, has it really been nearly a month?
In a tomboy's life, shoes are frequently taken for granted, but soooooo important. How am I supposed to walk, run, jump over tall buildings (single bound!) without proper footwear?? Above, you see the shoes that are on my feet 99% of the time, when I'm out.
The shoes on the left (black mules) are Clarks - not cheap, but not expensive either. They look great with slacks or skirts when I need to look like a grown-up. Not much of a heel, but enough to not look, ummmm .... "old lady-ish." I wear these about 0.1 % of the time.
The ones on the right (brown Merrells) are by far my most comfy shoes, and I can climb ropes, walk, or day hike in them (well, summer day hikes, boots for winter hikes). These are also not inexpensive, but totally worth it. I wear these 98.9 percent of the time.
I need new Merrells every six months or so. I need new Clarks ... well, so far, NOT. They get wiped down if they get dusty or mussed.
And for the record, the other 1% of the time is split between: hiking boots, tevas, and jazz sneakers, cuz this girl gotta dance sometimes!
Target those tomboy dollars on your footwear. Choose carefully, and you don't need that many pairs of shoes. Really. Truly. Sure, the Merrells cost more than a cut-rate sneaker, but my feet thank me. And life is too short to wear uncomfortable shoes. Cost per wearing is probably less than 50 cents a day. Uncomfortable shoes, on sale, might be 20 bucks and look great with a dress that you wear ONCE to your cousins' wedding. You know how many times I'd wear those 20 dollar shoes? ONCE. That makes them 20 dollars per day!
Think about it.
Later!
Monday, August 26, 2013
Stay strong, girlfriends!
So - whether you are a tomboy or not - you have those friends. Whether you are drooling over the latest in Gortex (TM), or their marvelous ability to wear heels and frills, we envy them. Oh, we do. They always look so great, and act so confident, that we want to go shopping with them! And it doesn't even matter if they shop at Value Village, or at Nordy's. They look great either way.
Problem is, they (sometimes) want to play dressup, with us playing the role of Barbie (TM, again). As in - "Why don't you try this on? It would look great on you!" And they might be right - it would look fabulous! But something about what they pick isn't right. It might be the price tag (we all have our limits). It might not be comfortable. The fabric might be dry clean only. Or it might be so trendy, that by next month it is out of date. Life is too short to not be wearing stuff that we adore!
That's when knowing your own boundaries, and having strategies for saying "no", is helpful. Tips:
(1) Budget. How much money do you have to spend? Take that amount in cash, and leave the credit cards at home.
(2) List out items that you really need and take that list with you. Buy those things first.
(3) If it's really a great item, have the sales people put it on hold for you to come back later. I find that about 24 hours is plenty of time for me to think about it. I also like to go back solo.
(4) If you have the idea, for any reason, why it wouldn't work for you, tell your girlfriend. She may appreciate the feedback so she can help you find stuff in the future. Stuff that you DO like.
And really, isn't that at least part of the reason why you two are friends? Because you want to hang out together and maybe help each other live a little better, a little livelier, and have fun? I thought so.
Go forth and TOMBOY! (TM)
Problem is, they (sometimes) want to play dressup, with us playing the role of Barbie (TM, again). As in - "Why don't you try this on? It would look great on you!" And they might be right - it would look fabulous! But something about what they pick isn't right. It might be the price tag (we all have our limits). It might not be comfortable. The fabric might be dry clean only. Or it might be so trendy, that by next month it is out of date. Life is too short to not be wearing stuff that we adore!
That's when knowing your own boundaries, and having strategies for saying "no", is helpful. Tips:
(1) Budget. How much money do you have to spend? Take that amount in cash, and leave the credit cards at home.
(2) List out items that you really need and take that list with you. Buy those things first.
(3) If it's really a great item, have the sales people put it on hold for you to come back later. I find that about 24 hours is plenty of time for me to think about it. I also like to go back solo.
(4) If you have the idea, for any reason, why it wouldn't work for you, tell your girlfriend. She may appreciate the feedback so she can help you find stuff in the future. Stuff that you DO like.
And really, isn't that at least part of the reason why you two are friends? Because you want to hang out together and maybe help each other live a little better, a little livelier, and have fun? I thought so.
Go forth and TOMBOY! (TM)
Tuesday, August 20, 2013
Tomboy cooking!
The main thing I've had to learn is how to make something that fuels and nourishes, which are really (in my mind) two separate things. But is MUST TASTE GREAT. (or at least good enough that I want to eat it)
"Fuel" to me, means "total calories". It's tricky, but vital, to get enough calories, without (consistently) getting too many. Fuel can be rice and beans, steak and potato, grilled chicken and tabbouli. Salad is generally a poor fuel - unless you load it up with plenty of protein and/or fatty stuff. Even then, it takes a while before it's taken in and used to make fuel (blood sugar). Not enough fuel, and I get droopy. (Note: I personally need about 1800 calories per day just to function. Just sayin'. Those low-cal diets are not my friend!)
"Nourishment" is all those little micronutrients - things that you don't necessarily need a lot of, like vitamins and minerals and antioxidants. Guess what? That same salad, with leafy greens, grated carrot, tomato, grated cabbage, beans, etc - that is wonderfully nourishing! Fruit also has some great micronutrients and I don't ignore it in my day-to-day life. But (as stated previously) - horrible as fuel. Not enough nourishment, and I get sickly - prone to infections, my skin gets drier, etc.
So, I need both FUEL and NOURISHMENT - regularly, and on an ongoing basis. I need fuel three times a day (sometimes more if I've had a good workout). I need nourishment - guess what? - three times a day!
My cooking style tends to revolve around "hmmm, what's in the fridge?" - so a lot of my recipes change depending on what's sitting in the crisper. (Note to self: OUT OF CARROTS)
My cooking is an attempt to incorporate both needs, which isn't really difficult if you are even moderately decent as a cook. Tabbouli, for example, is great: the wheat/bulgur grains are fuel, while all the salad-ish amendments are nourishing. If, like me, you can't eat wheat, you can use quinoa - which is actually even better as fuel because of the protein content. This recipe is great with BBQ chicken or fish, or by itself as a snack. My off the top of my head recipe follows - if there's an ingredient you can't stand, just omit it:
Tabbouli (you could make a double batch, as this keeps in the fridge pretty well for a few days)
One cup cooked bulgur (or quinoa)
Chopped veggies (total of 1-2 cups total): cuke, tomato, green onion, red onion (go out on a limb - try diced avocado in there sometime)
Minced fresh herbs (1/2 to 1 cup total): parsley, mint (go out on a limb and try cilantro sometime)
Other things that are mighty tasty in there: crumbled feta cheese, chopped olives (go out on a limb and try some bacon sometime)
Dressing: Juice of 1-2 lemons, about twice as much olive oil as juice, salt to taste, and ground pepper to taste. You probably won't use it all - but you can save it and it's great later on for a regular tossed salad. (out on a limb: lime juice instead of lemon, or add a pinch of cayenne or chipotle)
Mix it all up. Correct the seasoning - I like to use less dressing than I think I need, and then add more if it's not "right". I do like my tabbouli to be well-moistened with dressing, but it's up to you. If I have more dressing than I need, I save it to use on another salad some other time within the next week or so. No time to make the dressing? you COULD use regular oil and vinegar, or Italian bottled dressing. I don't, but hey, you decide. You are an adult!
Go forth and fuel. And nourish!
"Fuel" to me, means "total calories". It's tricky, but vital, to get enough calories, without (consistently) getting too many. Fuel can be rice and beans, steak and potato, grilled chicken and tabbouli. Salad is generally a poor fuel - unless you load it up with plenty of protein and/or fatty stuff. Even then, it takes a while before it's taken in and used to make fuel (blood sugar). Not enough fuel, and I get droopy. (Note: I personally need about 1800 calories per day just to function. Just sayin'. Those low-cal diets are not my friend!)
"Nourishment" is all those little micronutrients - things that you don't necessarily need a lot of, like vitamins and minerals and antioxidants. Guess what? That same salad, with leafy greens, grated carrot, tomato, grated cabbage, beans, etc - that is wonderfully nourishing! Fruit also has some great micronutrients and I don't ignore it in my day-to-day life. But (as stated previously) - horrible as fuel. Not enough nourishment, and I get sickly - prone to infections, my skin gets drier, etc.
So, I need both FUEL and NOURISHMENT - regularly, and on an ongoing basis. I need fuel three times a day (sometimes more if I've had a good workout). I need nourishment - guess what? - three times a day!
My cooking style tends to revolve around "hmmm, what's in the fridge?" - so a lot of my recipes change depending on what's sitting in the crisper. (Note to self: OUT OF CARROTS)
My cooking is an attempt to incorporate both needs, which isn't really difficult if you are even moderately decent as a cook. Tabbouli, for example, is great: the wheat/bulgur grains are fuel, while all the salad-ish amendments are nourishing. If, like me, you can't eat wheat, you can use quinoa - which is actually even better as fuel because of the protein content. This recipe is great with BBQ chicken or fish, or by itself as a snack. My off the top of my head recipe follows - if there's an ingredient you can't stand, just omit it:
Tabbouli (you could make a double batch, as this keeps in the fridge pretty well for a few days)
One cup cooked bulgur (or quinoa)
Chopped veggies (total of 1-2 cups total): cuke, tomato, green onion, red onion (go out on a limb - try diced avocado in there sometime)
Minced fresh herbs (1/2 to 1 cup total): parsley, mint (go out on a limb and try cilantro sometime)
Other things that are mighty tasty in there: crumbled feta cheese, chopped olives (go out on a limb and try some bacon sometime)
Dressing: Juice of 1-2 lemons, about twice as much olive oil as juice, salt to taste, and ground pepper to taste. You probably won't use it all - but you can save it and it's great later on for a regular tossed salad. (out on a limb: lime juice instead of lemon, or add a pinch of cayenne or chipotle)
Mix it all up. Correct the seasoning - I like to use less dressing than I think I need, and then add more if it's not "right". I do like my tabbouli to be well-moistened with dressing, but it's up to you. If I have more dressing than I need, I save it to use on another salad some other time within the next week or so. No time to make the dressing? you COULD use regular oil and vinegar, or Italian bottled dressing. I don't, but hey, you decide. You are an adult!
Go forth and fuel. And nourish!
Sunday, August 18, 2013
Good jeans, bad jeans
Jeans! so comfy, so useful. So easy to trash "your favorite pair" with grass stains, falls onto gravel/lava/coral, snags from navigating barbed wire, etc. So many tomboy things are hard on clothes! It amuses me that someone asks me how to preserve a good pair of jeans. I've made a lot of errors in judgement with what should have lasted a long time.
BTW, never wear white jeans around that darned red clay in Hawaii - do NOT ask me how I know this.
So here's the deal: you need to dedicate clothing for specific activities like bushwhacking up the mountain, walking across hot coals, horseback riding, roping sheep/goats/cattle, birthing foals/calves/lambs/whatever-baby-goats-are-called, etc. These jeans (and other clothing) can and SHOULD get pretty trashed. It's okay. You should absolutely launder these things - hopefully, the smell comes out - but the stains and snags are a PLUS. They have "street cred." These articles of clothing can and should include shirts, jeans/pants, socks, shoes, jackets, and even in some cases, heavy leather gloves.
For example, I use the heavy leather gloves to take to my cat to the vet, because I NEED THEM FOR THAT. (ROWR)
IF you find that your favorite workhorse pair of jeans is comfy and you want it for "formal tomboy wear" (going out with friends to a restaurant or something relatively civilized) - GET A SECOND PAIR. If you don't think you can remember which pair is which, get a sharpee pen and write "good jeans" in the waistband of the good pair, and "beat up jeans" in the other pair. Or something like that.
NEVER wear your good stuff for the activities that you even remotely THINK might be hard on them. Trust me. Some things can't really be fixed. Not even with bleach and a paid seamstress.
Happy weekend - go out and enjoy! Remember: skin heals. Clothing does not.
BTW, never wear white jeans around that darned red clay in Hawaii - do NOT ask me how I know this.
So here's the deal: you need to dedicate clothing for specific activities like bushwhacking up the mountain, walking across hot coals, horseback riding, roping sheep/goats/cattle, birthing foals/calves/lambs/whatever-baby-goats-are-called, etc. These jeans (and other clothing) can and SHOULD get pretty trashed. It's okay. You should absolutely launder these things - hopefully, the smell comes out - but the stains and snags are a PLUS. They have "street cred." These articles of clothing can and should include shirts, jeans/pants, socks, shoes, jackets, and even in some cases, heavy leather gloves.
For example, I use the heavy leather gloves to take to my cat to the vet, because I NEED THEM FOR THAT. (ROWR)
IF you find that your favorite workhorse pair of jeans is comfy and you want it for "formal tomboy wear" (going out with friends to a restaurant or something relatively civilized) - GET A SECOND PAIR. If you don't think you can remember which pair is which, get a sharpee pen and write "good jeans" in the waistband of the good pair, and "beat up jeans" in the other pair. Or something like that.
NEVER wear your good stuff for the activities that you even remotely THINK might be hard on them. Trust me. Some things can't really be fixed. Not even with bleach and a paid seamstress.
Happy weekend - go out and enjoy! Remember: skin heals. Clothing does not.
Thursday, August 15, 2013
Makeup for Tomboys!
My criteria for makeup (and anything I put on my skin): it can NOT irritate my skin or feel "heavy." It MUST look natural. And, if it is simple, easy to apply, FAST, and it doesn't bust the bank, then it's ideal!
This is what works for ME. You will have to decide it works for you, this is just one way to spin it.
First, concealer to cover up the worst of the worst - undereye circles, little red blotches, the rare zit. I dab it on, smooth it out so it's thin. (approx. 15 seconds, tops)
Second, I fluff on mineral powder makeup - it's easy, fast, sheer, and looks natural. It was tricky to find one that didn't irritate my skin, but I did and I'm happy with it. Don't forget to fluff some onto the neck and ears. NOTE: I use a lighter color in winter, than I do in summer - I do have some tanning even with the SPF cream that I use. (another 15 seconds)
Third, blush - I use a very pale blush as it's better to layer it on till it looks right, than to overdo it. (10 seconds)
Fourth, eyeliner - again, layering it on lightly two or three times till it looks "right". I used a magnifying mirror at first. I do about the outer 2/3 of the upper lash - and the outer 1/2 of the lower lash if I want a heavier look. (with practice, this takes about 10 seconds - without, maybe 30)
Finally, a little gloss or lipstick - I have a few to use, depending on whether I want a more natural look, or to liven it up with some color. I sometimes use a smallish brush to sweep the color out to the corners. Blot to remove the excess. Note: gloss is more moisturizing, but doesn't last as long, as regular lipstick. (10 seconds)
Like anything else, you can absolutely make this more complicated, but this is my basic routine that I now do most days. At the most, this might take me 2 minutes. I've timed it, it's closer to a minute. This is dependent on having the right tools, like brushes. Also on having a good cleanser to remove the makeup at the end of the day.
And there's some part of this that you don't want to do? Hey, it's your face, do what makes you feel best! :-)
How to amp it up for special occasions? Mascara (which definitely takes some practice), eye shadow (start with a really neutral shade of you don't wear it often), and brighter lipstick.
Most people don't think I'm wearing makeup, till they see me without makeup (like at the gym, or hiking on the weekend). It's subtle, but it covers the small imperfections and highlights my better features. It feels very professional. g'wan -- give it a shot. It's easy!
This is what works for ME. You will have to decide it works for you, this is just one way to spin it.
First, concealer to cover up the worst of the worst - undereye circles, little red blotches, the rare zit. I dab it on, smooth it out so it's thin. (approx. 15 seconds, tops)
Second, I fluff on mineral powder makeup - it's easy, fast, sheer, and looks natural. It was tricky to find one that didn't irritate my skin, but I did and I'm happy with it. Don't forget to fluff some onto the neck and ears. NOTE: I use a lighter color in winter, than I do in summer - I do have some tanning even with the SPF cream that I use. (another 15 seconds)
Third, blush - I use a very pale blush as it's better to layer it on till it looks right, than to overdo it. (10 seconds)
Fourth, eyeliner - again, layering it on lightly two or three times till it looks "right". I used a magnifying mirror at first. I do about the outer 2/3 of the upper lash - and the outer 1/2 of the lower lash if I want a heavier look. (with practice, this takes about 10 seconds - without, maybe 30)
Finally, a little gloss or lipstick - I have a few to use, depending on whether I want a more natural look, or to liven it up with some color. I sometimes use a smallish brush to sweep the color out to the corners. Blot to remove the excess. Note: gloss is more moisturizing, but doesn't last as long, as regular lipstick. (10 seconds)
Like anything else, you can absolutely make this more complicated, but this is my basic routine that I now do most days. At the most, this might take me 2 minutes. I've timed it, it's closer to a minute. This is dependent on having the right tools, like brushes. Also on having a good cleanser to remove the makeup at the end of the day.
And there's some part of this that you don't want to do? Hey, it's your face, do what makes you feel best! :-)
How to amp it up for special occasions? Mascara (which definitely takes some practice), eye shadow (start with a really neutral shade of you don't wear it often), and brighter lipstick.
Most people don't think I'm wearing makeup, till they see me without makeup (like at the gym, or hiking on the weekend). It's subtle, but it covers the small imperfections and highlights my better features. It feels very professional. g'wan -- give it a shot. It's easy!
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